Coming Out: Being Bisexual in a Small Town

BY: MISS MEGZ


I AM BISEXUAL.
That is what I told my best friend of nine years during a tornado drill while sitting in the hallway of our crowded, igneous school. It came up casually when we were naming celebs we were infatuated with. I asked her if she thought any female celebs were attractive, she blushed and named a few. That's when I made my confession, "Well," I said, feeling my heart beating in my throat, "I'm bisexual." I looked at her waiting for an 'ewe', but she just smiled and said, "Really?" I knew then that coming out wouldn't be that hard, but I was wrong. I never thought what others at my school, who are definitely intolerant to any "gay activity", would think of me. A fear manifests when I catch myself checking out other girls, including my extremely attractive Home Economics teacher.

Finding any comfort in much desired information in my library is scarcely in number. In fact,a law passed in Alabama in which any books depicting gay or lesbian subject matter would be immediately pulled from all school or public libraries. I was shocked and angry. Thus furthering my fear of being my true self, a sixteen year old bisexual young woman. I am virgin, but I am worried what gender will be "my first". A boy or the forbidden, same sex? What should it matter, right? If I love the person it should not matter what gender, religon, race or preference. However at the same time, how can I be proud of who I am when I have not one book nor confidant in my town to confide in?

Being bisexual is a challenge, as one can imagine, especially when my parents are old generationalists. Coming out to my dad was easy, but my mom, who wants me to have children, is against lesbianism, whether she is willing to admit it or not. However, my dad is against gay marriage, which I strongly advocate. He believes the ultra-conservative close-minded mantra of: Marriage should be strictly between a man and a woman. Which has to be the most degrading statement if I ever heard one.

It is a shame, I can let complete strangers on My Yearbook and Face book know my orientation, but I can not on My Space because than my secret will be all over school. Everyone in my tiny learning establishment has an account on My Space, therefore anything personal written in a blog...or bulletin can be the next days gossip thread. I guess that's what being in a small town will do. ]-:

So here is my official proclamation...Take it or leave it:

I AM A PROUD BISEXUAL WHO LOVES BOYS AND GIRLS. LOVE OR HATE IT.

THIS IS WHO I AM!